I decided that for the month of June I am going to take a complete break from anything Thelemic at all. I discontinued membership in all Thelemic groups on Facebook and on the rest of the Internet, and I am not going to read anything by or about Crowley for the month of June. 

In spite of what I wrote the last time I was here, I am not comfortable at all with the fill/kill issue. I can’t lie to myself and try to make it sound like I am. I have a lot of reasons that I don’t like it. It isn’t that the word “fill” has been replaced with a less comfortable word; it has to do with other questions that this action has brought up, questions about the structure of the OTO and the people involved in the leadership of the OTO. Out of those questions, more questions have come; what is the purpose of the OTO? Where is it heading? Is it a positive thing to be involved with in the first place? 

I’m not going to get any answers by hanging out in discussion groups or on Facebook with the kind of nuts I described in the last post. And I find that people are either uncomfortable discussing these things, fed up with people asking questions and don’t want to engage in any discussion about them, or else they are completely raving loony anti-OTO people and can’t be trusted. So, as usual, I’m on my own. (When has that been any different?)

So, a month off, no Crowley, no Thelema. I will decide what to do about being involved in the OTO after I take that month off. 



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4 responses to “break

  1. Luna Riviera

    And here I, a random Feri looking for something else, stumble across this, a month to the day. What did you decide? In any case be well—& you will choose rightly for you—

  2. Believe it or not, I still have not made up my mind whether or not to quit. I can’t work it out. I haven’t been to any local body meetings in a month. It kind of disappoints me that nobody got in touch, which may be kind of childish but I do wish they had. I still can’t work it out though.

    • Luna Riviera

      I feel you. I know NOTHING about Thelema; this sounds a litte like the great Feri sundering, though, in the interpersonal intensity of it. In journalism we used to say, “When you can’t get the story, THAT becomes the story”….maybe that’s true here too? That uncertainty is kind of its own answer? I send clarifying amethyst & salt vibes!

      • Thank you Luna – I appreciate it. I don’t think it’s as virulent or as loud as the Feri sundering, but the interpersonality of it can be intense. I just wish I knew why I cared. I thank you for the amethyst & salt!

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